This blog ain't dead! Up from the ashes, like an Axl Rose phoenix...

Chuck Klosterman reviews the new Guns N Roses album, "Chinese Democracy," in The AV Club. I haven't even heard the album yet, but this review is AWESOME.

Describing Buckethead's guitars:
"A song like "Shackler's Revenge" is initially average, until you get to the solo—then it becomes the sonic equivalent of a Russian robot wrestling a reticulating python."

I love the checklist he posits in Axl Rose's dreadlocked head:
"Sometimes it seems like Axl believes every single Guns N' Roses song needs to employ every single thing that Guns N' Roses has the capacity to do—there needs to be a soft part, a hard part, a falsetto stretch, some piano plinking, some R&B bullshit, a little Judas Priest, subhuman sound effects, a few Robert Plant yowls, dolphin squeaks, wind, overt sentimentality, and a caustic modernization of the blues."

I am starting a robot-python wrestling league ASAP.